NLL Insider

The tallies are in from last week and just like on the floor the Minnesota Swarm have earned a decisive victory over the beleaguered Chicago Shamrox. A hearty congratulations to you, Minnesota, for being better than the Shamrox.

This week I figured it was time to head west and take a look at a key match-up in the five team division. Excitingly enough, the game results are in and Portland has defeated Colorado 16-15 with a nearly last-minute goal from Pete Jacobs. Now that that’s out of the way we can get to what really matters:

Loading ...

 Loading …

I’m a little hesitant to critique the Jax logo because 1) I know Portland’s owner Angela Batinovich has some serious fashion design skills and 2) the burly man in the middle of it looks like he could beat up everyone on my street. However, if I were to let reason and good sense win then what would I ever write about? Also, I hate my neighbours. On we march.

I generally dislike cartoon people or caricatures in sports logos because they tend to look a little silly — exhibit a: the Buffalo Bandits day-glo Hamburgler — but for this logo I’ve made an exception. I still dislike it, but not because it strikes me as laughable. This logo actually frightens me because I grew up in a city full of skidurds and I know that although it may resemble one, this thing is not a cartoon. Not only does this logo man live in my hometown, there is roughly 30,000 of him. Fortunately for the NLL, Larry, Tom, Fred, Bruce, Ernie et. al. can’t hear the law offices of Sam Bernstein calling about a class action identity theft lawsuit over the noise of the Big Mouth Billy Bass at Fat Frank’s Pub and Grub.

It feels weird saying this, but I really like the rest of the jersey. It’s just a sharp-looking sweater. The white jersey is crisp, the black version is dapper, and the gold stripes add a nice continuity with the shorts. Portland has also earned an overly-enthusiastic high-five for their third jersey effort, otherwise known as the greatest jersey of all time and/or the big bad plaid abomination, depending on which side of the fence you’re gawking from. Whether you love it, like it, hate it, or think even Al Borland would point and laugh, it got you talking and (presumably) buying. Status: great success.

The Mammoth logo is commendable because way back in 2002 when they first cranked this thing out it would have been really easy for it to go really wrong. There are just too many ways to draw a furry elephant holding a lacrosse stick, and you can trust me on that. Instead they came up with a snow-capped mountain that swoops down into a pair of tusks, all in the shape of an M. A mountain with tusks is an imposing vista no matter what angle you’re looking at it from. You look at that thing and you just know that if it existed in real life and you tried to zip down it on a pair of skis you’d totally end up doing that hilarious thing where your gear flies off in all different directions and you go careening down the middle of the mountain in full view of the chairlift. It’s impressive.

In addition to the obvious fanciness of the big M, if you will direct your attention to the bottom left corner of the logo you will spot the letter C, which stands for Colorado. That’s another point on the plus side for the Mammoth because I managed to find it without smashing my forehead through the computer screen like I pretty much had to do while playing Where’s Waldo with the “ambiguous Swarm insect.”

The backdrop for the big scenic M is, of course, a blend of black and burgundy with a mountain landscape lining the bottom. This jersey has a gradient and that is awesome; I can never figure out how to do that with MSpaint! It’s original without being ridiculous, and that can be a difficult thing to do in the wide world of sports.

This is a close one, but when it comes right down to it, if I voted for the Lumberjax it would look like favouritism because I’m pretty sure I sat next to their logo in my women’s studies class. I’m finding ever so slightly in favour of the Colorado Mammoth but I’m definitely looking forward to the vote results. Speak!

Rate This Story:

(11 votes, average: 4.45 out of 5)

 Loading ...